On Relationships

I haven't been in a serious relationship for the longest time. Also I wouldn't consider my past one as real one even if we lasted more than a year because when I look back at that event in my life it was not serious. I was a kid and so was he thus it was merely puppy love.

There were instances when people thought I was in a relationship but to be honest it never reached that point. A couple of guys showed their interest and intention but there was no commitment involved in my end. Timing was not right for Mr. Miles Away. Agent Orange lacked the characteristics to sweep me of my feet. Refinite was too trying hard. Futbolero was a player. There was no The One. Then again maybe I am just choosy.

Should the drought of the male species be a cause of an alarm? My mom gave the go signal to pair me with a brave Singaporean. My younger brother spilled his bottle of beer when he found out that I had a boylet. My aunt interrogated me at our recent family reunion. And the list continues.

I know it has been a decade or so. Is it time to panic? No. In God's time when God's best is ready and when I am ready to be his God's best. But I pray and hope that it would be soon cause... I am ready for you... My One and Only. <3

On Pagod

Every single freaking day is a struggle. Sleep is prolonged due to the agony of another work day. Feet are dragged daily towards the office. Deep breaths are taken upon entering the prison.

Maybe I need a break. Maybe I am just burned out. But what use will a vacation do if when I get back I will face the same shit?

I do not want to throw the white flag. But I cannot seem to see the light at the end of the long and winding tunnel.

Nakakapagod
Ano nga ba ang tama?
Ano ang dapat?

Day 1 of 21 in Exile

I ran out of excuses and options and now I am in exile. That is the fact. So instead of being negative, might as well embrace the situation for time does not and shall never equal experience.

So how was Day 1?

First day was a day of firsts. It was my first time to take a dump on air. My first time to live on my own. My first time to eat in a restaurant wherein everything serve was bathed in chilli.

Through these experiences I've learned that despite the circumstances when one has to go one has to go. No questions asked. Moreover, given the situation, one will make do with what is given in order to survive.

Cheers to more firsts!

- - - -

Ito nanaman
Ang aking pakiramdam
Muling nahulog

'Di na natuto
Tibok ng puso ikaw
Ang tinatawag

On Heartbeat

My heart skipped a beat
'Pon reading the simple words
***, kamusta ka?

You know that feeling when you finally found someone you want to kiss and not be able to do so?  That is exactly how I felt with matching heart racing sensations. Undeniable, the hopeless romantic in me has struck again.

Maybe things could have been different if I am where you are right now. I would not be writing this anymore. Instead I would be by your side in a heartbeat...