On Looking For Answers

Why can you not say NO to the other person --- but it is all right to call a rain check when it is I who is involved?
Why do things suddenly occur whenever we have a so-called plan?
Why do you treat me as an option and not as a priority?

Why do I make an effort to preserve whatever we have?
Why do I even bother?

You cannot say no to others because they are your clients and I am merely no one.
Unexpected things come up because they are really planned.
You treat me as an option because that is what I am to you.

I make an effort for I thought what we have is something worth to be valued.
Now, I do not even know why I bother.

On A Player's Commitment

I need to be willing to make a commitment to being as good as I can be each time I play. I need to be willing and ready to do what has to be done to make a positive contribution in the most difficult of situations. I need to compete in each game as though there is nothing I will ever do that will be more important. I need to, more than anything, want our team t be the very best that we can be.

Is this to much for me to ask myself as a player?

On “Closing Thread Group. Please be patient.”

A patient person bears pain without any complain. A patient person portrays self-control despite grueling adversities. Oftentimes I demonstrate these characteristics. No pun intended.

As a corporate slave, I accept whatever tasks given to me -- as long as it is more or less within the scope of my skill set and/or they provide training. As a tester, I tolerate the time and again delays caused by “unavoidable” circumstances.

Waiting is a tedious task. It is not a wonderful experience. Time is wasted. Time lost is never reverted. Despite the tiresome incidents of waiting, I can contain myself – if still reasonable.

When JMeter (an automation tool) displayed the message above, I got off-guard. Imagine a testing tool asked me to be patient!

Apparently, I am not that patient after all.

On Shunga Shunga

In my whole existence, I can proudly say that I never been intoxicated. Maybe a little bit tipsy and that was it. That statement continued to be a 100% fact until last night.

I was sane but my perspective was tainted. I wholesomely entertained people and I bet they had a grand time. Thank goodness that I was still classy and cute despite my alcohol intake.

Jägermeister is certainly a “hunt-master”. It is my kryptonite. It stood by its name with honor and searched for me. It made me do things most liquor did not. The stag protected and preserved his game. Maybe mixed with a Bull the result will be different.

I drink therefore I am.

On Uncertainties

Here we go again. The other day, I got a phone call from Engagement. Currently they are seeking to close a deal. Proposals, budgets, resources – all those paper works and negotiations are in the works to win this project. Apparently, I am one of the candidates for this 3-month on-site assignment, which explained the phone call.

This afternoon, the RM head went up to me at my cube. He asked for my permission if it would be okay to line me up for the mentioned on-site project. Definitely, out of practice, before agreeing to something I asked for details. As usual, RM head does not have the specifics on hand as of the moment. All I got was nine months will be added to the initial three months.

With the so-called economic situation, the logical response that I had to give was my positive word. Did I make the right decision of saying “yes”, despite the minimal information?

Oh well. Nothing is certain for now. For this project to materialize is still uncertain. In addition, knowing how HS handled these circumstances, this will take decades to transpire – that is if ever it will happen. There is nothing I can do but pray what is best for my professed career and me.